Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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