you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
