Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
