he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
