U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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