Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I have tasted many bathrooms
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
