i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
two words: eviction party
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
