Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
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It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
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My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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