before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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