we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
