so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
handjob tips. give me some.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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