Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
