There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
please don't ironically join a cult
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