I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
