I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
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