She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
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