im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize