i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
