God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize