North Korea, Best Korea!
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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