Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
