I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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