So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
