He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
