im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
