you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Randomize
