Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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