you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
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