I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
