thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
