for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
