Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
