I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
