Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
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