No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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