apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
