so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
