She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Randomize
