One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
