I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
