She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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