at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I can't put those talents on a resume
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
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