I CAN MOONWALK!
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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