and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
I smell stomach acid.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
So gin and wine won't be happening again
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Randomize
