He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Randomize
