Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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