I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
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