You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
On Saturday, I sharted on my roommates dog while trying to make it smell my farts. Today I got security clearance to work for one of the most respected and secretive govt agencies in the US
It's the American dream
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
