sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
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