Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
