Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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